Showing Up in the New Year

Are you showing up?

Kenzie A. Bond, Empowerment Coach

What does that even mean, to “show up?” You’ve probably heard it time and time again, in self help books. from friends or coaches, or maybe you’ve dispensed this oft used phrase as a piece of advice yourself ……. but is there consensus on what showing up is?

When we talk about showing up, we could be referencing any number of ways to do so in our daily life - in romantic relationships, friendships, our work - but what I want to explore is how we are (or aren’t) showing up for ourselves. So much emphasis is placed on on interactions with others ….. are we being authentic? Vulnerable? Present?

But what about our most important relationship - the one with ourselves?

In case you couldn’t tell, I have been thinking a lot about the coming new year - the goals I want to achieve, the milestones I want to hit, but most of all what I want life to look like. What I want each day to be filled with, and when I look back on 2019 a year from now what I want to feel. I know this is a departure from the usual New Year’s Resolutions, but do those really work for you? Or are you like me, still trying to lose that last 5, 10, 25 pounds?

When I look back at 2018 I can definitely say it was a year of personal growth & development, and of foundation laying for the business and life I intend to create in 2019. I set out with an intention of taking every single opportunity to better myself in 2018 - no matter the cost! Let me tell you I did that and then some - my credit card is still smoking!

But seriously, I invested in courses, coaching, books….. you name it……. all with the intention of getting a different result than before. And it worked - my life is literally unrecognizable from a year ago. In a conversation with my boss last week she made the comment that I am happier and more effective than she has ever seen me, and I have to agree!

So instead of focusing on a list of “to-dos” for the upcoming year, I want to focus on showing up for myself. Showing up for myself in life will mean:

  • Stripping away titles, my ego’s desires, and what others may see me as, and figuring out what I want to do career wise

  • Getting brutally honest about my money mindset and taking real steps towards financial security

  • Being open to relationships (of all kinds - not just romantic) that are healthy and bring happiness, even if they aren’t what I thought they would be

I’m sure the list could go on and on, but these are the most critical to me right now, the areas of my life that I feel I can have the most impact by showing up in. Because truth be told, I have been actively avoiding them for years now. I dance around each of them, read a book here and there, maybe take an online program or course - but I haven’t fully shown up in these areas of life because honestly, they scare me.

What if after digging deep I find that I want to do something dramatically different that I am now (public service) and the blood, sweat & tears that went into my PhD goes to waste? Or even worse what if this is all I CAN do, and I will never have the freedom I truly desire? What if I open my heart and my life to a relationship and it ends terribly?

What if

What if

What if

One thing that I have found in 2018 is that the “what if” usually doesn’t happen…….and if it does we are able to navigate better than we thought. And the “what ifs” don’t go away with inaction, in fact they multiply as we allow our minds to wander down the path of missed opportunities and regrets.

So how are you going to show up in 2019?

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